jealousy is an arrow

use it as a north star

Jul 03, 2025

i can be a jealous ass bitch at times.

and i think that acknowledging when we do feel envious of others should be normalized more. it’s a normal human feeling that everyone at some point in their life has felt one way or another.

but what you can do…is decide what to do with that jealousy.

you can either…

let it turn you into a bitter person
or you can use it as a prompt to start moving in the direction you want to go

let me explain.

i’ve talked on here before about how my mid-twenties have felt like a bit of a stagnant period for me… and how frustrating that’s been. seeing people my age doing cool shit while i’ve felt stuck for the past few years? i mean… it’s easy to get jealous. admittedly, there have been multiple times where i’ve scrolled through social media and look at people posts and think “ugh what the fuck. that should be me.”

and then over time… that jealousy started to fester. not in any loud or obvious way… it just settled in quietly, reshaping how i saw everything around me. i found myself holding my breath whenever someone shared good news… bracing for that familiar mix of genuine admiration and quiet, internal shame.

i’m in the middle of my saturn return right now. it’s forced me to confront all the ways i’ve avoided taking myself seriously. one thing that keeps surfacing is how much time i’ve wasted sitting on the sidelines, envious of people who had the confidence to take leaps of faith. and i then i had this aha moment when i realized: jealousy is an arrow pointing to where i want to go.

think about it: the reason we get jealous of people in the first place is because they have something we want… and i think that comes from a scarcity mindset. it’s easy to go straight to: “okay just because they have the things i want means that i can’t have it for myself” but that’s not true.

there is space for everyone to build their own individual version of success. i no longer think of success as some exclusive club… but rather a community made stronger by its variety (and not its sameness).

the more i’ve embraced jealousy with open arms and treated it as something to learn from… the more in tune i’ve become with who i really am at my core. and i’m starting to give myself permission to believe that i, too, am worthy of having the things i want.

i’m in the process of letting go of this warped timeline i keep holding myself to about where i should or shouldn’t be in life, and starting to trust that i’m not behind. because when i stop panicking about where i “should” be, i can actually start building where i want to be.

there are two ways i could use my jealousy: i could either keep whining and pissing time away or i could use that energy to take real steps towards the version of my life i once thought was out of reach.

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