my love runs as deep as the pacific ocean
an ode to my solo morning beach drives
in april 2026 i got a tarot reading at this really cool spiritual shop i stumbled upon in the valley.
and honestly…i had zero intention of getting a reading that day. i was just walking around and saw they were doing thirty-dollar readings. i went “you know what…whatever. i’m just gonna do it”. i couldn’t tell you what compelled me…but i’m suuuuuuper glad i did (and i’ll explain why).
the shop itself was witchy as fuck. there were crystals…tarot decks…spiritual books…just a shit ton of really cool stuff. i promise i’m not gatekeeping this shop i just genuinely don’t remember the name of this place…i just remember that everybody working there looked like they walked off the set of sabrina the teenage witch.
i walked up to the register and was like “hey can i get a 30 minute tarot reading?”
and the guy at the register was like “yeah totally let me get our reader”
the tarot reader (a disheveled middle-aged woman with frizzy graying hair piled into a falling-apart bun and at least five necklaces tangled together around her neck) comes to greet me and guides me to this little room in the back of the store…a room with a multicolored beaded curtain and gorgeous burnt orange walls that smelled like she'd freshly sage'd the space. she spread her cards out on a green velvet tablecloth and asked me what i wanted to know. tbh i didn't have a specific question or anything…i went in completely open and asked to receive any messages my guides may have for me.
i don’t remember the exact cards she presented to me…but after the reading she told me something along the lines of: “based on the cards i pulled...your energy feels really scattered and overstimulated right now. you need some more grounding practices to help you center yourself. i don’t know if you’re a beach person…but the cards are telling me you should spend more time by the ocean. being near the water will help pull you back down to earth.”
and i was like…that is such a random thing to say. my immediate thought was “the fuck is the water gonna do for me?” like…of all the things my guides could’ve passed along, THIS is the message? go look at some water? i paid thirty dollars for a stranger to tell me to perceive the ocean. and the part that made it even funnier is that the ocean is genuinely nothing new to me! i grew up in la! my mom grew up in malibu and had us at the beach constantly as kids. being near the water is something i’ve done my entire life…so when this woman looked me dead in the eye and told me to go spend time near the water i was like…”lol i grew up here…literally what is the beach gonna do for me?”
so…i kinda brushed it off.
fast forward two weeks later…and i’m driving down the pch headed somewhere (i genuinely don’t remember where i was going that put me on the pch) and it’s a whole ass vibe: the sun is setting…there’s barely anyone on the road…the ocean waves are crashing…i roll down the window and my nostrils get engulfed with the smell of fresh sea salt…and i’m having this cute little moment…
and then it hit me.
wait.
this is literally…the same shit the tarot reader was talking about.
like…i lowkey rolled my eyes at the advice she gave because it just like…didn’t make sense to me at the time that just being by the water would be as healing as it is. and here i was! two weeks later! involuntarily doing the exact thing she said! and feeling exactly the way she said i would! feeling healed as fuck by the water!
after that i was like “damn…this tarot reader is really onto something”.
so i gradually started going to the beach more...mainly in the mornings (i’m an early riser) (plus i get to beat the traffic. and like…the fuck do i look like sitting in thick-ass pch traffic?) i’ll just get up before the sun…drive through whatever canyon is speaking to me that day and cruise along the pch while it’s still early and quiet and just…look out at the water and vibe for a bit.
this became a regular habit of mine…and now i do this drive at least once a week. sometimes i’ll bring my laptop and journal in the car with the ocean as my view (i don’t like journaling by hand because my hands cramp super easily and typing makes it way easier to get all my racing thoughts out). sometimes i’ll get an acai bowl (from sunlife probably) and park and eat…or sometimes i’ll just sit by the water and do nothing but listen to the waves crash.
and it’s sooooo theraputic! idk there’s something about staring at a body of water that big that just makes my brain shut up. it’s like…the ocean is so much bigger than whatever i’m spiraling about that day that my problems have no choice but to shrink a little. shoutout to the ocean for being emotionally regulating as fuck.
the best part is that every single drive is different. with each one i feel like i discover a new lookout point…or a cool spot to park my car…or a new route to the beach (there are a few different ways and at this point i think i’ve done all of them). like one day there was some construction on the pch and i had no choice but to get redirected back to the 101 through kanan dume road to get home (which i’d never taken before)…and omg. underrated route. it’s gorgeous. loads of pretty mountains and shit to drive through.
the weather is pretty unpredictable too because sometimes the beach (even in the summertime) will get foggy and overcast as fuck. and ofc this affects the experience i’ll have at the beach that given day (but also makes each beach trip super unique). there was one day i was going through las virgenes to get to malibu and it was crystal clear the entire way…until the second i drove into the canyon when the vibe completely shifted and it went all gray and foggy. i was genuinely pissed because i drove all the way out there specifically to catch the sunrise…and instead got completely socked in with fog. june gloom is a fucking bitch…man.
people watching is also really fun. there was the time a group of surfers paddled out right as the sun came up and it looked like a fucking movie. that morning i’d pulled up to this lookout point (that i AM gatekeeping because i don’t want other people finding it). it was barely 6:00 am and i fully expected to have the place to myself…and i look out and there are at LEAST fifty surfers already in the water just waiting to catch waves. and i’m sitting there like “what the fuck are you all doing up this early?” and then it’s like…
well.
they could ask me the exact same question.
it’s wild because the whole reason i even started doing any of this shit is that one offhand comment from a tarot reader. i just so happened to be driving the pch one day and heard her voice in my head going “this is something you should be doing more of” and now that it’s been like…three-ish months? since that reading…i can actually see how much those quiet mornings sitting and coasting by the water have done for me. there is a difference between growing up near the water and actually sitting with it on purpose. i’d been around the ocean my entire life…i just never stopped to actually be present with it.
the bitch knew what she was talking about. and if she is reading this…consider this essay as a formal apology.
as i write this…summer 2026 is in full swing. all i’ll say…is that this has become a very grounding summer for me with these morning beach drives. i feel so privileged to live somewhere i can even do this! the part that gets me every time is how unplanned all of it was…like i didn’t decide on some random tuesday that becoming a beach person was gonna be my next personality. it just sort of…happened bc i took a stranger’s advice.
so when i said at the beginning of this essay that i was really glad i got that reading…this is why. a disheveled tarot reader…a deck of cards…and the most basic advice imaginable completely changed how i spend my mornings and rerouted my entire summer for the better. i almost ignored her…and i would’ve missed all of this shit if i did! and that would’ve been tragic bc look at me now! a cool ass bitch who loves going to the beach!
so anyway…shout out to that woman in the valley who told me to go look at the water. easily the best thirty dollars i’ve ever spent.
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Was the tarot place the psychic eye?